Breathe
by Kozakura
Summary: A short romantic fic with Hotohori and and OC. AU, in which Hotohori is only surviving seishi and Houki died. Tried to make OC NOT Mary Sue. She DOES have some problems. Slight Angst, mostly on Hotohori's part.
1. And It's Been Awhile

Author's note: Yet another one of my wonderful fics. Again, tell me what you think, and if you like, I'll post more.  
  
~ ~ ~  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
1.1 Since I could hold my head up high  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
2 Since I first saw you  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
Since I could stand on my own two feet again  
  
A pale cherry petal fell from the branch, fluttering on a spiraling path down to the ground. The sun caught on a tiny dewdrop resting in the middle of the petal, dazzling it into a starburst. The fair blossom drifted to the ground, its singular beauty distracting from all the beautiful blossom's still on the graceful cherry tree. Its moment of life was it's slow descent to the soft grass of the garden ground.  
  
And in that moment of the small petal's life, it was the most graceful and radiant sight possible.  
  
~*~  
  
The empress was gone. Her death had left the country in shock for the past month, normally cheerful citizens sorrowful with loss. Their monarchs had ruled with a gentle hand, the country flourishing and prospering under their reign. Adored and admired by all, the empress had been a great loss to the country.  
  
The sorrow was too much for the emperor. His heart weakened by being the sole survivor after the summoning of Suzaku, it was shattered at the death of his wife, as he sat by her and held her hands in the last moments of her life. He had handed the run of his country over to his counselors, no longer able to find the will for the affairs of state any longer.  
  
~*~  
  
"Boushin." Hotohori called softly over to his son. The small child looked at him, hazel eyes large with wonder. He rarely saw his father, and each time it seemed to Hotohori that his son reacted as if meeting a new person, he had previously not known.  
  
The little boy toddled unsteadily over to where his father sat after dismissing one of the child's nursemaids.  
  
On the floor between father and son sat an old worn teddy bear. Drawing Hotohori's attention, it distracted him long enough, that he didn't notice Boushin's trip quickly enough. He reached out for his falling son, but did not catch him in time. The baby's head hit the thick carpeting with a soft thud.  
  
"WAHHHHHHH!" Boushin lay on the ground a moment before erupting into loud sniffling wails, more from fear than anything else. Fearful for his son's beauty being marred, Hotohori picked the child up, alarmedly checking the little face all over. Finding nothing, he heaved a sigh of relief and placed the child gently on his lap, and tried to calm the wailing 2-year- old.  
  
"Don't worry Boushin. You are fine, nothing happened to your little face, you'll be just fine." Hotohori bit his lip as the child kept wailing. Unsure of what would comfort the little one, he picked up the teddy bear from the floor and handed it to the child, who clung to it and kept up the loud wails.  
  
The doors to Hotohori's left rolled open, displaying another nursemaid of the small child. The girl took in the scene briefly, before rushing forward to take her charge from the anxious father.  
  
Smiling at the emperor, she gently rocked the child, holding him close against her shoulder, whispering comforts.  
  
"Heika." She inclined her head as much as she could. "I'm sorry for not bowing, but Prince Boushin seemed in dire need of help. Did he fall again? It tends to happen with the very young, when they're first learning to walk." She smiled again, as the Prince's wails slowly turned to sniffles. "They get over it quick enough."  
  
Hotohori frowned, angry that he hadn't been able to make his own son calm of his fears. He watched the nursemaid as she calmly set the little boy and his teddy bear down near the rest of his toys.  
  
"I wasn't able to calm him. My own son, and I was unable to comfort him." Hotohori blurted out. "Why doesn't he trust me?"  
  
The young woman bit her lip. Did she dare tell the emperor the truth? She would probably be turned away from her job, out on the streets, and then where would she be? Her conscience battled her common sense for a moment or two before her conscience won. She sighed, unable to lie to the man before her.  
  
"Gomen nasai, Heika, but…" she paused, once again unsure. "I hate to tell you this but it is because he does not see you nearly enough."  
  
Hotohori looked at his hands, feeling his heart sink as he realized the truth. All those times he had missed seeing Boushin for a meeting of his advisors, a meeting with dignitaries… Each time he did that, it was a lost chance in letting his son get to know him, learn to love him, trust him. Hotohori blinked back tears at this, realizing he was perpetuating the vicious cycle of their family.  
  
"A-arigatou for telling me." He whispered. "I'm glad to understand why. I shall just have to remedy this then, won't I?" Smiling he looked at the nursemaid. "He seems to trust you. Do you care for him a lot?"  
  
Her face broke out in a wide, glowing smile, happiness playing over her features. "I am the Prince's main caretaker. I see him to sleep every night and wake him up every morning. I was called away before you came in." She bowed her head again to the emperor. "My name is Reis."  
  
~*~  
  
As the days and weeks passed, Reis and Hotohori became friends rather quickly, seeing each other everyday, Hotohori coming in to visit his son more and more often. He found the time he spent with the young nursemaid and his son relaxing and carefree, enjoying playing with the beautiful little baby and talking to Reis. She began to teach him about the child he sired, seeming to know more about children then anyone he had ever known.  
  
Hotohori admired her ability with Boushin. Her competence to keep the small child from crying, from getting bored, lonely… He had never had such attention when he was young. His own nurse's had neglected him as a child, preferring to sit and gossip, while he took care of his own distractions. He grew up lonely, never knowing any playmates, younger or older then himself. He was kept away from other children, his father feeling no one's breeding high enough for Hotohori to associate with them.  
  
~*~  
  
"Careful, now. There you go…" Reis coaxed Boushin, as he tripped across the carpet to his Father. His face was concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other, and not tripping over any sneaky bumps in the rug.  
  
He finally fell into Hotohori's arms, a small giggle bursting up from the young throat, a smile lighting up the adorable face. Hotohori looked up at Reis happily. She smiled back, lighting up the room.  
  
Hotohori paused for a moment, for the first time noticing how beautiful his son's attendant was. He looked at her a moment, before tearing his eyes away from the sight, afraid to be caught staring.  
  
Turning Boushin around, he sent the little boy back to Reis, who held her arms out as he toddled into them, not noticing the emperor's intent gaze on her rather then his son.  
  
~*~  
  
"Hotohori-sama?" Reis asked quietly, trying not to disturb the half-asleep child she was rocking.  
  
"Yes Reis?" Hotohori looked up from his scroll, where he sat across the room.  
  
"Why did you hand the country over to the royal council? You always did such a good job of it. The people love you. You were always a source of comfort to them." She looked at him nervously, afraid she had poked to far.  
  
"I don't mean to offend you, but… your people miss you Hotohori. The Council isn't half as compassionate as you were. They don't have private conferences when people request it, and they are doing nothing to stop some of the tougher street gangs." She pleaded with the emperor with her eyes.  
  
"Hotohori. Your people need you."  
  
~*~  
  
"Well, I believe that concludes today's mee-" the council president was cut off as the doors to the private chamber were opened.  
  
"Heika!"  
  
"Good afternoon, Ishida-san. I trust you're well." Hotohori smiled benignly at the Council president who stood in front of him, shock playing over his features.  
  
"Well, yes, Arigatou, Heika, but, if I may ask, what is the purpose of you coming back in here like this?"  
  
"I have decided to reinstate my reign as Emperor of Konan. " 


	2. And Everything I Can't Remember

And everything I can't remember  
  
As it all may seem  
  
The consequences that I've rendered  
  
I've stretched myself beyond my means  
  
~*~  
  
The wooden chimes played a tentative song, quiet and slow, dancing in time with the wind. Hotohori found tears streaming down his face as he lay in bed, quiet notes drifting to his ears. He remembered.  
  
A young girl, thrown roughly into a situation far beyond her capabilities, escaping them only through her passing.  
  
A street-wise kid bound to the young girl by love willing to do all, even die, for her.  
  
A pretty youth, with large, eyes, warm like the summer, destined to breathe his last breath cold and alone.  
  
A man with a joyful face and sad past, fated to perish in the fight for his country.  
  
A child of the mountains, fiery and passionate above all, preordained to die at his own hand.  
  
A quiet solitary man, caring for everyone until his life force was drained.  
  
A genius child, willing to do anything for his friends, but fatally adamant against betraying them.  
  
A boy emperor, forced to maturity too soon, the lonely reminder that good rules over evil.  
  
but with it's downfall evil takes it's victims  
  
Hotohori rose from his bed, reluctant to relive the deaths of his friends one more time. To remember the harsh cold that resided in his chest. To face the thought of bleak eternity alone.  
  
He walked the halls of his home, his castle, night wind smoothing the hair back from his handsome face. He closed his eyes briefly appreciating the warmth of the night, the scent of cherry blossoms in the air, the black- blue shadow-light of the time just before midnight.  
  
His feet wound their way around the palace, bringing him to the doors of his son's room. Hesitantly, afraid to wake the gentle boy up, he pushed the doors of the room open, taking a quiet step inside.  
  
He walked over to the boy's crib, peaking over the ornate side of it, in at his sleeping son.  
  
The sleeping child had his thumb near his mouth, eyes closed peacefully, head resting gently on his pillow. His body seemed so small in the large crib. Hotohori wondered if he was ever really that small. Reaching in he gently stroked his sons cheek, a smile growing on the emperor's peaceful face.  
  
"Heika?"  
  
Hotohori started, taking his long hand away from the cubby face of Boushin. Twisting his head, mane of hair flowing around his waist, he stared wide eyed at the figure in a previously unseen doorway to his left.  
  
"Who's there?"  
  
"Oh, gomen, Hotohori-sama." The form glided forward towards him. Her face caught in the moonlight, and Reis's gentle smile and quiet eyes beamed at him.  
  
"Oh, Reis. You gave me a bit of a start there." He smiled back at her. "But what are you doing up so late? I'd think you'd want to be asleep in bed by this time."  
  
"I was. Quite often I wake up in the middle of the night and find myself going out to the porch." She gestured back to the door where her room adjoined Boushin's. "I heard you and thought it best to check who was in the Princes room. But now that I see it is you, I suppose you will prefer it if I leave." She turned to go with a smile.  
  
"Wait."  
  
Reis turned, eyes contemplating the emperor.  
  
"Yes, Hotohori-sama?"  
  
"Will, you stay with me?"  
  
If the young woman saw anything odd about Hotohori's request, she said nothing about it. Walking back to his side, she laid her hand gently on top of his, looking down at the small child in the bed.  
  
"If I may your highness?"  
  
"Yes, Reis?"  
  
"Why have you been crying?" She glanced up at him, eyes serene. "I don't mean to pry, but it is sometimes better if you talk about what troubles you."  
  
Hotohori pulled his hand from hers, and walked over to the window. Looking out he sighed, closing his eyes.  
  
"I miss them Reis." He said simply. Continuing, he elaborated, "The miko. The seishi. My wife. So much from those days was lost upon the final decline of Kutou. So much innocence and beauty. So much good. I feel it everyday, but sometimes it comes to me strongly. My world is declining, Reis. It was so pure when I was a child. No trickery, no stabbing men in the back. As I grew older, it seemed to happen more and more often. Honor was lost. Honor…I used to believe in the word. Now… I don't know if it's so much a truth as an abstract concept that can never be fully realized." He turned to her, backlit by the full moon, seeming ethereal in the glow. "The world is so full of trickery, Reis. It's so difficult to live with a clear conscious. I've killed, Reis. I've taken the lives of men with my own hands. I've taken away the beliefs of families. I've destroyed homes. I always swore to myself that I'd always fight for good, for the right of the people. But is any fighting good? Is there any way to justify murder? My soul is sullied, impure. But… would it have been better if I had never killed at all? Would it have been wiser for me to let Kutou take over my lands, allow them to oppress and kill my people? The Right is too hard to see in life. It is too complicated, too unsure for me to be certain what the right decision would have been. What decision would have been right for my people. I was so greedy, so childish in my ways of thinking. I was still a boy when I was expected to be a man." Hotohori sighed, melancholy washing over him.  
  
"You can never be sure what the right choice is, Hotohori-sama. Life is too entangled for anyone to realize what the right decision is. If you had waited 5 years, 10 years, even 20, I doubt you would still know the right decision to make. Decisions the fate an entire people can never be made perfectly. Someone always gets hurt, always gets slighted. It's no use mourning the death of them all now. Your people will always exalt you as their emperor, the gods chosen one." She walked over to him, taking his hands once again, causing him to look at her, so she could emphasize what she was about to say.  
  
"They will always love you. You could have made different decisions along the way, but you made the right one for them. Because of your decisions in your life, your country lives and thrives today. And your people will always be grateful to you for that."  
  
Hotohori seemed to think on this, looking back out the window. Apparently coming to a decision, he turned back to Reis where she stood at his left.  
  
"Thank you, Reis."  
  
Hotohori lay a hand on the side of her face, and she smiled up at him.  
  
"Your welcome, Hotohori-sama."  
  
~*~  
  
Work ruled Hotohori's life for the next weeks. Their was so much to be done it was unbelievable. From sunup to long after sundown there was incredible amounts of wok to do, and Hotohori was unable to brush things off as casually as he had done when he was younger. Life was difficult now, and he felt the pain of his people. He had to find a way to decrease the poverty and suffering in his kingdom, now. He had to get rid of the crime in the back streets of the capital, and the disease in Tamahome's old town, now. So much needed to be done, Hotohori doubted he could ever finish it all in one lifetime.  
  
"Of course you can't finish it all now." Reasoned Reis, as he spent one of few free hours in Boushin and Reis's rooms. "You can never perfect something. But you can come as close as you can to it. You are trying to change problems we've had for years, centuries, even. Life is difficult. Besides," she said, lighting a small candle beside Hotohori's chair. He watched as the light bounced and flickered, illuminating her beautiful face, "It's the small changes you make that really count. Visiting your son more is very important to him. He appreciates it." She stood up and picked up the smiling baby from the crib. "And Konan will appreciate it when he becomes their emperor, and rules justly." She smiled back at the Prince, and sat him on Hotohori's lap, from where he beamed up at his father. Boushin reached out and grabbed a lock of Hotohori's hair. Leaning against the Kings chest, Boushin played with the lock, smiling quietly to himself.  
  
"I doubt I'll ever be as good with him as you are, Reis." He looked up at her, praise in his eyes. "I want to thank you, for being there for my son."  
  
"Oh, it's no problem, Heika. I grew up in a large family, and always wanted children of my own. But-" she smiled, holding her hands out to the side. "I never found the right person."  
  
He looked at her thoughtfully for a minute before looking back down at the child in his lap.  
  
"I'm sure you will someday, Reis. I'm sure you will."  
  
~*~ 


	3. Since I Can Say That I Wasn't Addicted

A.N.: This is a brief Hotohori P.O.V.  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
Since I can say that I wasn't addicted  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
Since I can say I love myself as well  
  
~*~  
  
I know I shouldn't.  
  
But I do.  
  
It's not right. I've been married before. I should honor my wife.  
  
My son loves her.  
  
I L-  
  
I can't.  
  
It's impossible.  
  
I do.  
  
I want to.  
  
And I do.  
  
Every time I'm near her.  
  
Every time she turns to me and looks at me, a smile in her eyes.  
  
But-  
  
I'm not ready yet.  
  
I can't – feel that way about someone else.  
  
Not yet. 


	4. But All That Seems to Disappear When I'm...

And it's been awhile  
  
Since I've gone and messed things up just like I always do  
  
And it's been awhile  
  
But all that seems to disappear when I'm with you  
  
~*~  
  
The curse.  
  
Every time he looks at me like that, that's all I can think of.  
  
The curse.  
  
someday girl you'll no pain and sorrow like i have.  
  
you'll lose the man you love and the son you love as you have made me lose mine.  
  
and then you'll be sorry.  
  
It has worked once already.  
  
Will it work again?  
  
Will Hotohori be strong enough to resist that curse?  
  
It's not his fault.  
  
I can't help but love him. He's my emperor. I love him as a leige to a lord.  
  
And something more...  
  
No! no no no! Not like that! I don't love him as I loved Shinen.  
  
I think.  
  
No.  
  
I don't.  
  
Please, oh gods. Hear my plea.  
  
Keep him safe.  
  
Keep him safe.  
  
~*~  
  
Hotohori walked quietly to his son's room, praying a stray footstep would not alert a government official, lurking around the corner like some rabid beast, ready to pounce on the emperor the moment he saw him.  
  
Grasping the doorknob, he turned it quietly, and tiptoed into the room, gently shutting it closed behind him.  
  
"Thank Suzaku." he breathed, relieved at having reached his destination without being accosted.  
  
A light giggle breezed in through his thoughts. Opening his eyes he lifted his head to see Reis standing before him in a pale green summer dress. She was smiling, eyes twinkling mischievously.  
  
"Something wrong, Heika?"  
  
"Hotohori, please. I get called Heika and Lord Saihitei too much. I'm bloody sick of it."  
  
"Well then, Hotohori, Boushin and I were just about to go out to the gardens to get some fresh air. Would you like to come?"  
  
"I'm afraid I would be tackled by many angry cortisones, and our fresh air interrupted by their stink of politics. Why did I go back to being an active emperor?" Hotohori couldn't help sigh. He hadn't gotten a break for the past eight days, and slept barely five hours a night. He had forgotten how hard running an empire was. Or perhaps he had never ran it this way before.  
  
"I promise, they will not tackle you." Reis grinned. "I'll keep them away."  
  
So with a sigh and a smile, the three place occupants wandered out into their backyard jungle.  
  
~*~  
  
"Chichi!" Boushin called over to his father as he stumbled in the way only babies can around a shallow koi pond, chasing the small goldfish. Boushin pointed at the goldfish and smiled at his approaching father, two teeth forming his grin. With a giggle he plopped down on the ground, splashing a hand in the pond and causing goldfish to alternately scatter and regroup.  
  
Hotohori crouched by his child, placing one hand on the ground to steady himself. His long hair swung forward over one shoulder, framing his face elegantly.  
  
Reis strived not to stare the emperor and his son, spreading a small blanket on the ground and settling onto it.  
  
Boushin called over to Reis, "Mama!"  
  
Reis blushed incredibly, unable to look at Hotohori.  
  
"No, Boushin. I am your komori, not your mama." She smiled gently at the child.  
  
"Komo-ee?" The baby looked at her doubtfully. "Mama." He held up his arms asking to be picked up.  
  
Reis bent down to pick up the child. "No, Boushin, Komori."  
  
"Komo-ee?" He looked at his father, as did Reis.  
  
Hotohori, hiding his blush well, smiled politely. "It's doubtful he will be able to pronounce 'Komori' for a while. I do not mind his calling you 'Mama' if you don't."  
  
"I doubt it would be appropriate. Besides, Boushin needs to show respect for his oka-san, Houki-heika. I doubt she would like her only child calling me, a lowly Komori, 'Mama'. I don't want to risk the dead's wrath. I've already been on it's wrong side before." she added quietly.  
  
Hotohori frowned, creasing his perfect forehead.  
  
"When?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"When did you receive the wrath of the dead before?"  
  
"I'd prefer not to say." Reis whispered, putting Boushin back down to play with some flowers.  
  
"Please?" Hotohori looked up, curious about his mysterious friend.  
  
Reis sighed.  
  
"It starts five years ago, before the Suzaku Seishi even realized their destiny."  
  
* * *  
  
I was barely old enough to consider the bond of love between a mother and her child yet, just old enough to be able to see couples just older then me on the street and sigh, wishing I would someday be like them. I was young and bright, just beginning to open up to the world around me, just opening my eyes to the unseen wonders of the world.  
  
My father was a merchant who sold silk in the town near our house, buying from other people and selling it to the rich for higher prices. We made a nice living in this fashion, nice enough to make us the richest family in that province. I worked in the back of the shop, taking inventory nightly, making sure we had not been cheated during the store's hours.  
  
One night I was counting the bolts of blue silk we had from Kutou, the pile almost to the ceiling, and top heavy with the beautiful color. It was the best selling material that year, smooth as water and the color of the sky. There were so many bolts I had lost count twice before I finally got the appropriate number. I was just about to check my numbers with Ichiro and Naisu, the father and son who stacked the silk in the back of the store and helped me with inventory, when I heard a loud thump behind me. I stumbled backwards, hitting the heavy pile of Kutou silk, each bolt wrapped around a thick piece of wood. With my gentle bump, the entire pile came crashing down.  
  
Burying Ichiro and Naisu, standing on the other side of it.  
  
It is awful, you know. Knowing you've killed someone. I know you know what it's like, Hotohori. It's something you can't quite imagine until it actually has happened to you. The feeling of icy-cold sorrow rushing through your veins. The knowing, just knowing, you've done the most hideous act you can ever do.  
  
It was then, that it began.  
  
Chizuko, their mother and with stood before me, as I watched the other workers pull the heavy slabs of material and wood off their unmoving bodies. Her eyes burned with an unspeakable rage, limbs trembling in sorrow.  
  
and hate.  
  
As she turned away from her husband and son her eyes caught me, the guilty murderess. Her hand cast out, pointing at me as if she spoke and incantation.  
  
"You. You did this. Someday, girl, you'll no pain and sorrow like I have. You'll lose the man you love and the son you love as you have made me lose mine. And then...then you'll be sorry!" She turned from me, shoulders shaking as she erupted in tears.  
  
I sat their, trembling, feeling the curse wash over me.  
  
. . .  
  
Nobody in the village knew about this. My family covered it up, the workers threatened and paid off, the widow moved to another village... That was good, because if anybody did, my father would have never found anyone to marry me.  
  
Three years later, as soon as I turned fifteen, there was a line of matchmakers at the door. Fat ones, thin ones, tall ones, short ones, old ones, stooped over so they looked at the ground all the time, young ones, their heads held up high with the importance of their job.  
  
My father picked out the boy quickly enough. Shinen, a boy of the Kodoko family, the second richest in town. They made furniture in their workshop in back of their house, table and chairs of the finest pine in all of China.  
  
We were married one week after the decision, and I started living with my family that very night.  
  
A year later, just when word of the Suzaku Seishi were starting to turn heads in my village, my little son, Kabuo, was born.  
  
I was sixteen. I had the most beautiful little boy, a loving husband, and an excellent life. I was the happiest woman in all of Konan, for a short period of time.  
  
And then I turned seventeen.  
  
The great war between Kutou and Konan began, and soldiers were called up from my town, Shinen included. He left me and Kabuo on that bright spring day, kissing us both, telling us he loved us.  
  
Two days later he was dead.  
  
I took to morning, staying in bed all day, unable to move for fear of falling apart without him. My husbands family took care of Kabuo, waiting for me to decide to start living again.  
  
It was three weeks after that, when news of the heir being born was going around, that the news of my son dying was brought to me.  
  
I almost died myself when I heard about my beautiful, innocent, wonderful baby boy dying.  
  
I thought I could never live again.  
  
It was only when I came here, thinking I could find a job as a maid, or perhaps cook, to get my mind of…everything, that Houki died. They needed someone to care for the young heir; to make sure the child grew up loved, cared for.  
  
And in taking care of Boushin, I began to forget, slowly about my great sorrow. I did not dwell on the curse, day after day, every hour, every minute a consummation of my thoughts. I threw my life into taking care of your son.  
  
And then you came to visit him. And I understood what my purpose in life is.  
  
To make sure both of you live.  
  
To make up for all the deaths I've caused.  
  
* * * 


	5. As it All May Seem

And everything I can't remember  
  
As it all may seem  
  
The consequences that I've rendered  
  
I've gone and messed it up again  
  
~*~  
  
Reis looked down at her hands, still in her world of sorrow.  
  
"That," she said, "Is the other reason I don't want Boushin calling me Mama. If…if I love him too much, and if he … if he loves me like his mother… I will undoubtedly cause sorrow in his life. The curse…" she choked on a sob, "The curse will kill him…"  
  
With that Reis pressed her hands up to her face and allowed the sobs to come, her hair falling in a curtain, hiding her sorrow.  
  
Hotohori felt heartbroken at the sight of his cherished friend sobbing over the unchangeable past. Standing up from his seat on the grass, next to his sleeping son, he walked over to Reis, gently taking her in his arms. She pressed her face against his shoulder, allowing the tears to come, and holding tightly to the emperor as he gently stroked her hair.  
  
"Oh, Reis." He said softly under his breath. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so, sorry." He rested his chin gently on the top of her head, feeling himself close to tears. He cradled her trembling body against him, his arms tight around her.  
  
Her tears slowly tapered out, and Hotohori pushed her hair back off of her face as she looked up at him quietly.  
  
Hotohori couldn't help think of how beautiful she looked as she gazed unflinchingly at him, tear stains drying on her cheeks as her hair blended against his own. He slowly moved to her as his heart compelled him to kiss her trembling lips.  
  
Reis watched as Hotohori moved slowly to her, a need unrestrained in his eyes. She felt her heart beat in time with his she was so close to him now. Her fingers gently reached up and touched his cheek as she moved up to meet his lips…  
  
A cry interrupted them as a palatial messenger clomped through the plants to their seat on the grass. They sprung apart an instant before the man caught sight of them.  
  
"Hotohori-sama! The officials have sent me for you! It is a dire emergency and you are needed to help! Quick you highness!" The young boy's eyes were wide, and he bounced from foot to foot as he waited for Hotohori to get up and come with him.  
  
Hotohori obliged with a sigh, and suddenly embarrassed he turned to Reis without quite looking for her.  
  
"I suppose I must go. I will see you and Boushin late though. I promise."  
  
Reis nodded, studying the grass, and waited until he was gone before picking up Boushin and walking back to their room.  
  
~*~  
  
Reis opened her eyes to the reflection of water on her ceiling. With a sigh and a sad smile she rose from her bed, walking out of her room to check on Boushin.  
  
"Your Majesty!" Reis, in a rather skimpy nightgown due to the heat of the recent days, gasped and flew back into her room. Peeking her head around the door she stared at him wide eyed. "What are you doing here, Heika! I'm not properly dressed!"  
  
Hotohori smiled in amusement as the nursemaid came back out of the room in an all-encompassing robe. A blush stained her cheeks as she peeked in on the prince who had managed to sleep through her hysterics. Turning back to the emperor she smiled.  
  
"Would you like anything, Hotohori? Have you had breakfast yet?"  
  
"Yes I have and No, Reis, nothing, thank you." He gazed happily upon the young girl as she settled in a chair near by him. "Have you heard about the festival tonight?"  
  
Reis nodded. "Is Boushin going to attend? Is there anything special you would like him to wear?"  
  
"No, I think it would be best if Boushin stayed here tonight. But," Hotohori leaned forward, gazing into her eyes, "I was wondering if you would like to come with me?"  
  
"H-Heika…I…"  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Well… Hotohori…um…who would watch Boushin…"  
  
"There are two other women who take care of him when you visit your family are there not?"  
  
"Well, yes…but won't they be going?" Reis stammered, panicking.  
  
"No. I already checked. Everything is fine so that you can come. But…will you?" Hotohori stared at her, holding Reis's hands.  
  
Looking up she grinned.  
  
"I would be honored your majesty."  
  
~*~  
  
A gold kimono, with a red lotus flower print. Red frogs closing up the neck. The dress fit Reis perfectly, and she said a quick prayer of thanks to Suzaku that it had not been attacked by moths in the long time since she had last worn it. Standing in front of the full-length mirror in her room, she smoothed out the dress with shaking fingers. Touching them to her hair, she tucked a loose strand behind her ear, biting her lips. Swallowing nervously, she walked out to the room adjoining hers.  
  
"Well?" she asked of the two other women.  
  
"You look beautiful!" Asuka said eyes starry.  
  
"I miss going to festivals." Sayuri said mournfully, gazing upon Reis's dress and hair. She pulled Boushin close and hugged him, cooing to the little one. "Doesn't mommy look beautiful?"  
  
"Sayuri!" Reis gaped at the younger girl "Don't tell Boushin I'm his mommy!"  
  
"Maa?" Boushin looked up at Reis and held out his chubby hands, begging to be held.  
  
"Oh, Boushin." Reis took the small child from Sayuri, and held him close, tears slipping down her cheeks.  
  
"Reis, you have to stop worrying about the curse." Asuka stood from the floor, standing near her friend. "You've been sad long enough. The gods wouldn't mean for your sorrow all your life."  
  
Sayuri rose, hugging Reis and Boushin "Besides they wouldn't let Hotohori die." Her eyes grew shadowed "He lived when all the other seishi died." She looked down and Reis remembered the young girls love affair with one of the seishi. "He's the sole survivor of them. If he could live against Kutou, live to defeat Kutou…" She looked into Kim's eyes "A backwater town curse isn't going to kill him."  
  
"Sayuri's right, Reis. You can't worry about what that woman said to you, so long ago. It's done with. You know what she felt. But now…It's time for you to know happiness again. A greater happiness then before." Asuka put her hand on Reis's cheek. "Go to him, Reis. He loves you. You love him. There's no need for you to worry anymore."  
  
"We promise." Sayuri said quietly, taking Boushin from Reis again. "Now go."  
  
"Go to the festival." Asuka whispered.  
  
"Go to Hotohori."  
  
~*~  
  
"Wei do you know who that is with the emperor?"  
  
"No, I don't, Feng…though she looks familiar…"  
  
"Yeah…Aha! I know, she's that girl who takes care of Boushin!"  
  
"huh… you think they have something going, Feng?"  
  
"It sure looks like they do…"  
  
~*~  
  
Hotohori and Reis were the talk of the festival, though they were so wrapped up in each other they hardly knew it. They sat at the head table of the feast, laughing and talking quietly, uninterrupted by the people around them.  
  
~*~  
  
As the night progressed Reis grew more comfortable in her surroundings. She happily sat in her chair beside Hotohori, watching as a troupe of dancers performed to a small group of shamisens and drums. Their long willow like movements left her breathless as they reenacted a popular folk legend about two lovers, who loved each other but were forbidden to marry.  
  
The men and women of the troupe gracefully danced out the story, their bodies wrapping around the story, becoming one with it, becoming part of it, making it theirs…  
  
Reis looked down at the table as Hotohori's hand entangled with hers. Looking over at him, she found his dark eyes searching hers.  
  
"Hotohori…  
  
"Reis…I…" Hotohori seemed lost as he looked at her. "I-"  
  
Suddenly a burst of applause startled the two, and they turned forward to the dancers, hands pulling apart to join in the applause…  
  
~*~  
  
The festival disbanded shortly after midnight, the once active hall turning into a quiet sanctuary, as Hotohori left to escort Reis back to her room.  
  
The quiet halls of the palace served as peaceful guardians to the couple. They walked quietly beside each other, lost in their own thoughts. Passing through the palace like ghosts, Reis and Hotohori arrived at Reis's door sooner then either would have liked to.  
  
Reis quietly opened the door, and peeked in. Sayuri and Asuka were sitting on the couch, heads together, asleep. Boushin was sleeping quietly in his crib, obviously put there by the two exhausted nursemaids.  
  
Reis smiled despite herself as she closed the door, turning back to Hotohori. She looked up at him, leaning back on the door.  
  
"Thank you for inviting me for the festival Hotohori… I had a wonderful time…" Reis smiled up at him, her large eyes glowing.  
  
Hotohori gazed down at the young women.  
  
"Thank you for coming Reis. I don't think I would have enjoyed it half as much if you weren't there…"  
  
Reis smiled again, shyly.  
  
"Well…I think I better be going…" She turned back to the door, and began to open it.  
  
"Wait…" Hotohori caught her wrist, turning her towards him. Reis looked up at him, leaning against the door once more.  
  
"Please Reis…just listen to me. I- I know this may seem sappy or…odd…but….Reis, I love you. I do, and…I don't know how I can go on living without you by my side. I know this may scare you, and may make you want to leave. I know your afraid of the curse that woman put on you, but…but that was so long ago, and… Reis, if you left me, I would be worse off then braving the curse. I don't know if it will affect me at all, I don't know if … if I will die from it…if it will pass me and I'll go on living, but…but- I know one thing. I know that of all the people I know, all those who I loved and have died…I know I love you more then any other person I ever met. And I know that you love me. I know because this kind of love could not be one sided. What I'm feeling…what I always feel for you, could not be hopeless. It could not be the kind of love one can ignore. And I know, I know, that I will not be happy again if you leave me. I love you Reis. I love you more then life itself, and will go on loving you until the day the earth stops turning."  
  
Reis closed her eyes. Hot tears welled down her cheeks as she listened to the man in front of her profess his feelings.  
  
"Hotohori…" she trailed off, raising her eyes to his. Reaching out he brushed tears off of her cheeks. She shivered at his touch, at his concerned gaze.  
  
Slowly the emperor leaned forward, capturing her lips with his own, a task he had been trying to accomplish for days.  
  
The wait had truly only made the final moment sweeter. Hotohori relished the kiss, the taste of Reis's mouth,  
  
Reis slowly reached up wrapping her arms around Hotohori's neck as he held her close, responding to the kiss passionately.  
  
Slowly, unwillingly almost, Hotohori pulled away from the kiss, leaning his forehead against Reis's, eyes closed, arms wrapped around her waist.  
  
"Hotohori."  
  
"Yes Reis?"  
  
"I love you."  
  
~*~  
  
Fin. 


End file.
